2011-02-28

Article: Maastricht Travel Writing Awesomeness

Den Haag, Nederland

Maggie wrote what critics (me) are calling a "must read" entry on our recent trip to Maastricht. Focus is on the downs and ups of travelling in the off-season. She may have low-paid career in travel writing ahead of her!

Enjoy!

The familiar Dutch train system sign on Maastricht Centraal

2011-02-25

Tip: How to Setup Shortcuts for Google Translate

Being so bad at Dutch, I do a lot of translation from Dutch to English and vice versa. With so much translation between two specific languages, I find that it pays to create bookmarks that pre-load the languages I want. It's simple to do in Chrome, or any browser.


Here's how:

  1. Go to Google Translate (translate.google.com)
  2. Set it to the languages you commonly use (e.g., English and Dutch)
  3. Leave the textbox blank and click "Translate". 
  4. Your URL should have something like "#en|nl|" with the two letter language codes you want at the end of it separated by "pipes" (usually SHIFT+\)
  5. Create one bookmark in your browser where the URL is "translate.google.com/#en|nl|" and the other is "translate.google.com/#nl|en|" and name them something like "English to Dutch" or "English->Dutch" etc.
  6. For extra credit, you can add it to your "Bookmark Bar" so that it is always accessible


As a heavy user of Google Translate over the past few months, I usually notice when Google introduces new features to translate. Here are a couple more tips and tricks for Translate:


Translate Emails - Turn on message translation inside Gmail. Go to Google Labs (you have to enable Labs if you have not already). This way you can get those Groupon messages from Bogotá and easily translate them from Spanish to English and then jet in for the weekend. Be wary of turning on too many of those Labs things. I think it slows Gmail down.
Alternate Translations -  Point your mouse on the word to figure out what original word or phrase is associated with it (highlighted in yellow). When you get your translation, click on the translated word for alternate possibilities. This gets pretty hairy with long documents



I am, albeit behind, three quarters of the way done with Dutch Rosetta Stone. I'll update on that soon too.

Succes!

2011-02-22

Dutch Immigration Update (2/2): Not Bad News

The Hague, The Netherlands


Cracking the Dutch Immigration's Code

Last week we got a letter from the IND (e.g., Dutch INS) requesting more information about my business. This was neither good news, at least, the news we were hoping for, nor bad news. The IND requested a certification of my bank accounts from a registered accountant and simple set of opening financial statements. This was relatively simple set of documents that required a bunch of leg work to secure and some misadventures in speaking Dutch.

The request gave no further information about when we should expect a response. We are rounding out the three month mark since I submitted my application. This was when the agent said we should expect to hear something. We were warned, however, as a result the international treaty under which I applied, it could take longer. The visa I was issued still allows me to stay until May so we *still* feel pretty good about the whole process.

I do still feel like I have applied to college and I am waiting to hear. The question is, should I be hoping for a thick envelope or thin envelope? The last one was very thin and caused a lot of distraction. I am hoping the next one has a greencard.

2011-02-13

Q2: Coffee Shops without Koffie

Maastricht, Nederland



Some of the most common questions I received while I was back in the States over the holidays were about illicit substances in The Netherlands. A random sample:
  • What aisle at the supermarket has the cannabis? Herbs and spices? Produce? Floral? (Answer: It is only sold at “coffee shops” or Smart shops)
  • Is it permissible to smoke a hookah on the subway? (Smoking in a public, closed areas is illegal)
  • Do people give marijuana plants instead of poinsettias during the holiday season? (No, they often give homemade gifts or write funny poems)
Seemingly, Dutch people pride themselves on tolerance and openness as a society, but, this is not precisely why The Netherlands “tolerates” drugs like cannabis. As many of you already know or experienced for yourself, The Netherlands allows the possession of “soft” drugs, like cannabis. While still technically illegal, possession of up to 5 grams of cannabis is not prosecuted. However, the Dutch government considers heroin and cocaine “hard” drugs, prohibits their possession, polices, and prosecutes them aggressively. Instead of prosecuting the problem as a criminal issue and pushing the practice underground, the Netherlands tries to treat the problem from the demand-side as a disease. In this way, most Dutch believe that drugs have a “negative” impact on society and should be avoided. Consequently, the Dutch have very low levels of use and addiction.

“Coffee Shops” sell cannabis and also allow you to smoke inside. I know of three in The Hague including the two on our block. It is illegal to promote the sale of cannabis, hence these places are called “coffee shops” or “tea houses” and are harder to spot (which is why I probably only know of three) Incidentally, if you want to buy a coffee (koffie), go to a “cafe” because the Coffee Shops pretty much only sell cannabis and hashish and accessories.

The two Coffee Shops on our block are depressing places. There are very few windows, through which you can see dozen chairs surrounding a couple fold-up picnic tables with ashtrays on top. The sidewalk outside reeks of marijuana and marijuana smoke. They are little more than drive through drug dealers. I hate to be a no-fun-nik, but it does lead to a lot of sketchy people on our street and alters, somewhat, an otherwise quiet neighborhood on a canal.

“Tolerating” marijuana also creates a lot of ironies:
Thank you for not smoking (tobacco) – like the rest of the West, tobacco smoking indoors is strictly prohibited. This means no tobacco smoking is allowed (technically) inside marijuana-smoke filled coffee houses. This presents a small problem because most people mix their cannabis or hashish with tobacco. In the one “less-sketchy” coffee shop in the centruum, they have a “smoking” section, where you may smoke a cigarette. Seating is limited to two persons.
Please Report Plantations - There are campaigns to identify and shut down “cannabis plantations.” The town hall will even provide you with “scratch and sniff” samples so you would know how to identify one. According to the brochure, growing large amounts of pot indoors is dangerous because it can lead to electrical fires and wastes water. No mention of the health dangers of the extreme consumption of Cool Ranch Doritos and Mama Celeste frozen pizzas.

Like many Western governments in recent years, The Netherlands has tilted to the right of the political spectrum. This conservative bent has given more weight to the parties who would like to increase restrictions on sale of drugs. For the past few years, due to pressure from large E.U. neighbors like France and Germany, Dutch governments (regional and national) have been trying to limit the sale of illicit drugs. For example, Maastricht, a Dutch border city we visited, ratified a law forbidding sale to non-Dutch residents. This creates a host of interesting questions because many E.U. Citizens believe that they should not be denied rights if they immigrate to another E.U. country. This will be interesting to see how it plays out as it winds its way through Dutch and E.U. courts.

My takeaway is probably no surprise to you. While I am not a smoker or a toker, this approach seems “neater” than criminalizing the behavior and pushing it underground. Besides, the results speak for themselves. The Dutch have fewer people who smoke pot less often (arguably) and with much much less violent crime and that is hard to argue about.

2011-02-07

Q1 - Kafka's Greencard (Visa Update (1/2))

Den Haag, Nederland



Many of you have asked what my visa status is. I appreciate all of the concern and I am grateful for those of you who helped with the visa application. I still have not heard anything, and this is definitely a “no news is good news situation.” Currently, I have a 6 month temporary visa whilst awaiting the decision on my application. We would be able to appeal, should I receive a “NEE!” from the Dutch Immigration (IND). Also, some nice people we met who work at the UN have said we should contact them before I leave the country. We feel like have solid backup plans in any case.

(Here is a longer, Kafkaesque story about applying for a residence permit in The Netherlands)

It's good to be lucky. The Dutch visa process continuously reminds me of that. I won an ovarian lottery long ago. It was not due to any work or risk-taking on my part. This is both funny and sad at the same time. When I attend my various immigration appointments, I remember (and promptly forget) what a luxurious position I am in. The people  waiting in queue at these government offices have desperate, tired looks on their faces. I can afford to be annoyed at the bureaucracy. They cannot.

Several weeks ago, I received a registered letter from the city government that said I missed an "integration" appointment and that they took the liberty of scheduling a new appointment. Also, the letter stated I could be fined if I missed this new appointment too. The letter was written only in Dutch and something was lost in the translation that Google provided. It did not explain what "integration" was nor whether or not my application for a residence permit had been accepted or rejected. The letter stated that I had to bring all my documentation (e.g., passport) and that I should not miss the appointment. I hoped that the appointment might shed some light application I filed with Dutch immigration two months earlier.

I arrived, gave the receptionist my appointment letter, and they directed me to the waiting room, where there were a lot of hopeful families waiting in queue for some positive outcome to their own meeting. The female agent who called my name was young, had dyed-blond hair, and had a round face. I introduced myself in pidgin Dutch, she had a quizzical look as if she was straining to understand my accent. I caved and I asked in Dutch if she spoke English. She frowned and said “Yes.”

Once we sat down, she asked me very sternly, in English, why I missed the first appointment, whether or not I knew how serious the Dutch “integration” requirements were, and if I knew what the integration law was. I answered all questions with a sincer “no” and apologized for missing the first invitation. I learned that the Dutch Immigration law, passed in its current incarnation in 2007, requires non-EU immigrants to take Dutch language courses and learn about Dutch culture. “Perfect!” I thought as I must have had an excited look on my face at the prospect of free language and history courses.

She then asked for my “green card.” I replied that I did not have one yet. Her eyes widened and she asked “why not?” I explained that I have a temporary stamp in my passport that allows me to stay for six months while the IND processes my application. She asked where I was from and for my passport and I told her I am “American.”

Immediately, her steely exterior shattered and she became visibly agitated. She stumbled to get out her next request for my paperwork. She then blurted out something like “I am very nervous about my English, I don't normally speak with native English speakers.” I told her not to worry and that she speaks perfect English, like almost every Netherlander I encounter.

She then looked in her database at my records, and she saw that my Dutch residence permit application is still in “procedure”, which means “no decision” from the IND. Then she told me that I was mistakenly sent the letter for this appointment and that it would be unlikely that I would be eligible for the integration classes and that I should call prior to returning, even if I receive an appointment notice. It appeared I, once again, had broken the system as an American. It must be a rare thing that a U.S. Citizen immigrates to the Netherlands in South Holland without a company sponsored work permit or other exception. I feel like an out-lier at all of these appointments.

The whole appointment took no longer than ten minutes. As I walked out I saw some of the people who angst-fully waited in the lobby with me. Perhaps they missed their first appointment too. Their officials still had stern looks on their faces and the discussions appeared tense. I promised it would would take me longer to forget my lottery winnings this time.

Only Three Questions

Utrecht, Nederland

January was “Know Your Nethers” month for us. Three weeks ago we went to Haarlem (highly recommended by me), I took a self-guided bike tour to Delft, and two weekends ago we were off to Maastricht. Maastricht is the most remote part of The Netherlands you can go. The long train ride gave me some time to reflect on my visit back to the States over Christmas.


It was really good to be “home” but I missed being in The Netherlands more than I thought I would (although, I should not confuse missing Maggie with missing the Netherlands). While home, I was able to catch-up with my family, see my niece, and see a few friends (fewer than I would have wished). There were three questions I received while I was home, I think I can paraphrase them thusly:
  1. What is your visa status?
  2. What about the drugs...?
  3. What do you do all day? (Questions two and three were normally linked)

I will update each one with a blog post this week.

2011-02-02

Photos: Eurotrip, First Quarter

Den Haag, Nederland

We meant to send this image out on New Year's day (Notice all the time I spent in GIMP making the "Wishing you a..." curve to the ferris wheel). The best laid plans...


That reminded me that I wanted to post some of the photos we had taken since we moved to The Netherlands. Enjoy!

LUXEMBOURG
COPENHAGEN
BRUGES
PARIS
NETHERLANDS